Everyone looks forward to their birthday I suspect. I hope for most people that it’s a day that is swamped with messages, some expected and some a surprise, of love and appreciation.

It’s my birthday and I’m glad to celebrate it as it feels somehow the spotlight is on me as a celebrity for the day.

But the really really nice thing about birthdays is that everyone gets to be a “celebrity” once a year, and that’s nice. Everyone needs to feel important and special and not only on their birthday, but it’s an equal opportunity reason to celebrate one another as we all celebrate our birthday.

Birthdays are an opportunity I feel to “spark joy” by giving someone in your life recognition, and a compliment by letting them know that their life made a difference to you, including saying WHY!

That’s the critical and most important segment of a compliment, the saying of the reason WHY when you give thanks. Compared to just “thanks” it makes the thank you meaningful and sound less perfunctory. It’s the whipping cream of the hot chocolate compliment; don’t give thanks without it. ♥

According to Juli Fraga in her article called “How to spark Joy in your life” – giving joy to others can spark joy in your own life as well.

She says that “relational savoring” (observing joy in others) enhance our own ability to enjoy and savor positive events and emotions.

Savor small moments of pleasure

Most of us have at least one joyful interaction each day. However, it’s easy for these experiences to go unnoticed.

With practice, though, we can train our brain to look for joy. Among social scientists, this is called “relational savoring.” It’s our ability to enjoy and savor positive events and emotions.

To practice relational savoring, imagine you’re a joy detective. Identify one positive interaction that you’ve experienced recently. Perhaps it was a snuggle with your cat, a meaningful conversation, or dinner with a friend.

As you think of this memory, pay attention to how your body feels. Sensations such as calm and warmth often signify the emotion of joy. When you notice a positive sensation, try to savor it. Stay with the moment and notice any other pleasurable feelings such as gratitude, awe or happiness that arise.

Research shows that relational savoring can prolong our experience of positive emotions, which benefits our well-being in the long run.

(below are Juli’s suggestions to simultaneously create more joy in our own lives while also creating joy in others lives also)

– JULI FRAGA

What a strange post for a birthday I suppose you might be thinking. You are probably correct (chuckle)

My birthday will quickly bite the dust, in less than 24 hours of course, but what I wanted to do in this post was share to this author’s (Juli Fraga) idea about “sparking joy” in others but also for our own benefit to create more joy in our lives. Everyone loves a “two-fer” !

The ways to create more joy in our lives are:

1. Pay someone a compliment. Even saying “It’s nice to see you today” goes a long way. Watch the reaction you “sparked” and let their joy and happiness rub off on you.
2. Savor Small Moments of Pleasure. In your busy life it can be easy to miss a hummingbird, enjoy the colours of autumn or simply slow down to taste a meal. Snuggle with your cat, have a meaning conversation or share a coffee with a friend and let it soak in a little before you move on. Juli says that calm and warmth you feel are indicators of joy and happiness if and when you slow down to savor your day.
3. Smile, even when you don’t feel like it. Driving is when I notice many people lose their smile but smiling has a positive effect according to Juli to “release” dopamine and serotonin. When you can smile, and I wonder if a little smile with become your face’s go-to sparking joy (again).

It’s my birthday and to all my friends, and others who read this blog – I hope your life is full of smal and large moments to savor and bring a smile to your faces.

One last note from Leo Buscaglia – his name is a link to learn more about this man 🙂

He was the first to state and promote the

concept of humanity’s need for hugs:

5 to survive,

8 to maintain, and

12 to thrive.

Thank you everyone for visiting, and reading, thrive everyone! ♥ – Hugs, hugs, hugs. ♥ David