One internet source I read often is called Simple Marriage – the discussions on this site are invariably thought provoking and interesting.
The latest discussion is about “Nice Guys” and I suspect while I am not in complete agreement with his comments – he definitely gives his readers sometime to “chew over“.
Check out the BONUS POINTS THEORY I think he finds fault with “good deeds” for wrong motivation. I am in agreement with that.
I think it can be a recognition need for men; most men do enjoy doing good deeds for their spouse and family. The problem arises if the need for recognition isn’t met. The same goes for anyone. Recognition is HUGE, give it freely – it all goes back to remembering to say PLEASE and THANK YOU like we were told when we were 5.
Don’t say “why should I thank them, they should be doing blank and blank, it’s their job”. Maybe that is true, but whether you are taking out the garbage, whether your doctor is getting paid for helping you or not, I suggest “recognition” and manners will get you far!
The article also promotes seeking to be a “better you“. I like this concept. I think that is a motivation I can relate to. If I want to be in better physical shape; then I have to do something because I want to feel better about myself or for my health, but NOT because some person tells me that I “should”. {in fact a book I am reading talks about removing “should” and not to use that word – comment? }
As always, I welcome your thoughts!
Life and Random Thinking 